I try not to make a habit of watching the shopping lifestyle channels on Freeview, but they can be surprisingly entertaining at times. I think it’s the combination of enthusiasm, desperation and mindless babbling that makes them so attractive (I get like that at work sometimes too, so I can sympathise with the presenters). That, plus the knowledge that being a good presenter in these circumstances is so, so difficult – just watch the clips of The Apprentice where novices try this out if you don’t believe me.
Anyway, my family and I love the demonstrations on Ideal World for a well-known brand of pressure washer from their expert, Derek. He’s great. He claims to spend his life outside of the studio scouring rubbish tips and auctions for old paving slabs, garden furniture, fence panels and anything else covered in moss and slime that can be restored to being “as good as new, if not better” from a blast of his vario or dirtblaster lance. He’s full of useful information, too. I learnt this morning that you shouldn’t use the dirtblaster lance on wooden garden furniture as “it’s too powerful”.
He’s almost encouraged me to buy one several times and I might have done, had not a friend of mine lent me his earlier on this year. Boy was it good. I have a lovely clean patio (courtesy of “the wife“) and sparkling garden furniture now.
But here’s the thing. I can see myself using a pressure washer like this once a year – at most. So no matter how tempting Derek makes his powerful yellow machine look, no matter how many different attachments it comes with and how many paving slabs he brings back to “as good as new, if not better” condition, I’m not buying one.
Even to avoid ED209 revision or working on my seen question, I’m not about to go around scouring the municipal tip in Derby to find sundry garden objects to blast clean. They don’t like you doing that there anyway.
Well, not unless a certain shopping lifestyle channel wants to pay me to enthuse for them, that is. I’ll provide my own yellow wellies …